There are times in your life when you wanna let go an illusion but in contrast there are times when you hold tighter to that illusion than to any other concrete thing you currently have, he is for me the most concrete illusion ever, you can almost touch what I feel for him, anyone who has ever heard me talk about him has and will, for the very first time their lifes, touch a feeling.
His appearing in my life, this time more likely to stay on it, has given me back the inner strength I once thought lost, and when I thought that I lost it again he delivered it to me again in a silver window (no platter, ‘cause it was a window).
It sounds really like I am dependant on whatever it has to do with him…. I probably am, I learned to live without everything he ever gave me but I also lived with high very very high expectations, it has and will keep on giving me heart problems (in the romantic way of that…. No heart attacks or so)
Although I think he once accomplished to fulfill everything in my MUST HAVE list …. Today I think, for the moment (and only because I stil haven’t get to the point I once were for him), only the illusion and memories of him accomplish them…. But like I said at first, sometimes you wanna let go sometimes u hold the illusion tighter …. With him its always tighter, it has become a part of me a part not everybody knows because only few would understand that I don’t have an obsessive crazy attitude but a romantic illusion one.He protects me, he doesn’t know it yet but he does he protects my dreams my capability of loving of believing of dreaming of trusting even, he doesn’t know now but he will, cause I need him to know how important he is in my life, cause if u have influence in a life as much as he has on mine is worth to be aware of that achievement, is no that often when someone becomes a standard of perfection even if it is for just one person. Someplace in my heart and my brains I feel he’ll complete me and he’ll help me become the person I am supposed to be and that I want to be.
His appearing in my life, this time more likely to stay on it, has given me back the inner strength I once thought lost, and when I thought that I lost it again he delivered it to me again in a silver window (no platter, ‘cause it was a window).
It sounds really like I am dependant on whatever it has to do with him…. I probably am, I learned to live without everything he ever gave me but I also lived with high very very high expectations, it has and will keep on giving me heart problems (in the romantic way of that…. No heart attacks or so)
Although I think he once accomplished to fulfill everything in my MUST HAVE list …. Today I think, for the moment (and only because I stil haven’t get to the point I once were for him), only the illusion and memories of him accomplish them…. But like I said at first, sometimes you wanna let go sometimes u hold the illusion tighter …. With him its always tighter, it has become a part of me a part not everybody knows because only few would understand that I don’t have an obsessive crazy attitude but a romantic illusion one.He protects me, he doesn’t know it yet but he does he protects my dreams my capability of loving of believing of dreaming of trusting even, he doesn’t know now but he will, cause I need him to know how important he is in my life, cause if u have influence in a life as much as he has on mine is worth to be aware of that achievement, is no that often when someone becomes a standard of perfection even if it is for just one person. Someplace in my heart and my brains I feel he’ll complete me and he’ll help me become the person I am supposed to be and that I want to be.
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